On A New Role
The times after marriage and before pregnancy I often wondered how motherhood would change me. There were times of panic when I thought I would lose myself in mom jeans and t-shirts that I was forced to wear, because my body didn't maintain it's shape. I was concerned that my new role as "mom" came with expectations of looking a certain way...more tame.
I am a graphic designer. Being a graphic designer doesn't mean you have a particular style, but once I discovered my love for design, I discovered where my fashion preferences lived. I like fun patterns, and loud colors. I wear a lot of skinny jeans, mostly because they are the only pants that look good short, but I admit I love them. If I can refer to a shirt by a name like "puppy shirt" or "tiger dress" to Daniel and he understands completely, then it's probably a good fit in my wardrobe.
I was worried that teal hair, purple eye shadow, and tattoos would be cause for judgment in my parenting ability, but then, I didn't have real world examples of moms like this.
What I have discovered is that Soren has helped me to be more myself. I can project my "fashion sense" on him as long as he doesn't care what he wears. If I can care for another human being, then I shouldn't be afraid of what people will say about a nose ring. Now I have the perfect excuse to go to petting zoos, and play in water fixtures. And most of all, I realized that I shouldn't be so worried about how people perceive me.